The MacGuffin

The Harry Potter series finally comes to a close. Some of us may know what will transpire in this film because we’ve read the book. But this is something different. After Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 there will be nothing left for us Potter fans. No new book to pore over, no new film to anticipate. It’s a sad feeling, but also a good one. It’s sad to know that we’ll never find out more about these characters we’ve grown to love. One the other hand, it’s a rare thing to feel so good about a long running series. The disappointing Sorcerer’s Stone aside, every one of these films has at the very least been a good way to spend two hours. Some of them have been very good films. While this finale doesn’t reach the heights of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (my vote for best film and book of the series), it is a very good film and one of the best I’ve seen this year.

It was with nostalgic curiosity that I went to the new feature film version of Winnie the Pooh. As a child, Winnie the Pooh cartoons and books were amongst my favorite entertainment. Ever since then, I’ve held a special place for them whenever I would see them in stores. After seeing the running time of this film listed at a brisk 69 minutes, I wasn’t sure what to expect.

Every Saturday night the Tomb of Terror opens, unleashing reviews of the obscure and the classic in horror cinema.

I hate spiders. I’d rather be mugged than see a large spider in the same room as me. They are awful, alien-looking things that need to be stopped. “What’s the big deal?” You ask. “They kill insects for us…and the circle of life…blah, blah, blah.” I don’t care. Did you know that in Africa there are spiders the size of dinner plates? Fuck that. I think that the various nations of the world need to stop fighting amongst themselves and rally against the real enemy, the spider. Tonight’s film, Arachnophobia, shows just what can happen if we are to allow these terrible creatures to live. I don’t know about you, but I’d feel pretty bad knowing that a swarm of spiders attacked Jeff Daniels, all because we didn’t man up and wipe them out. Destroy the ecosystem, you say? You’re damn right I would.

There is a universal relatability at the core of Horrible Bosses. No matter what kind of person you are or how well you’ve been brought up, there is a sentence that has crossed all of our minds at one point or another: “I’d like to kill that guy.” Now, it was probably thought in the heat of the moment after some asshole cut you off on the freeway. But the idea was there, if only for a split second. However, there are very few of us who would actually go through with such an idea. This fact is what makes Horrible Bosses a film that many people will be able to relate to, but one that doesn’t totally sell its convictions. The filmmakers are hoping that audiences will think “I hate my boss. Life would be so much easier if he was dead,” and that will be enough for them. Unfortunately they were so sure of their premise that they forgot to actually make it a convincing plot development that three ordinary guys would turn into murderers after little more than one drunken conversation.

Every Saturday night The Tomb of Terror opens, unleashing reviews of the obscure and the classic in horror cinema.

Gaston Leroux’s 1910 novel The Phantom of the Opera is a piece of horror literature history. It sits alongside Bram Stoker’s Dracula from 1897 and Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein from 1818. All have been adapted many times on film and hold places as members of the Universal monsters stable. What sets The Phantom apart is that it was the first of the three novels to be adapted into a feature length film, and it has never become a long-running franchise. Both Universal and Hammer Studios sequelized Dracula and Frankenstein to death, while Phantom has just been seen onscreen in over a dozen remakes. I’m a big fan of the Universal monsters and have seen nearly all of the films included in that unofficial series, but for some reason never got around to watching the two famous Phantom adaptations that the studio produced. I’ve read Leroux’s novel and enjoyed it very much, but as far as The Phantom on film goes, I’m way behind. In fact, the two versions I’ve seen are very different in style from all the others. I saw Joel Schumacher’s musical adaptation and quickly realized that I was not the right audience for it. Tonight I’ll be covering the slasher take on The Phantom that was released in 1989 and stars Freddy Krueger himself, Robert Englund.

The Seduction of Dr. Fugazzi is a Troma film starring Faye Dunaway. (How did that happen, again? Does Lloyd Kaufman have dirt on poor Faye and blackmailed her into this film?) Mr. Carducci is talking to a shrink about being a pedophile. The shrink is Dr. Fugazzi, and she is helping Carducci get help, since he abducted two young Jewish girls last Halloween. Somehow, he appears to be out and walking around instead of in jail. Fugazzi’s assistant thinks he should be locked up. Consequently, Dr. Fugazzi is basically a dark-skinned Indian dominatrix type of shrink—you don’t run across that everyday. Then again, I haven’t gone to a psychologist, so maybe this is more common than I realize.

Spencer and Allen review Pixar’s latest animated adventure Cars 2, from directors John Lasseter and Brad Lewis.

This segment is also available on Stitcher, iTunes, and Zune. The audio version can be downloaded directly from here.

Every Saturday night The Tomb of Terror opens, unleashing reviews of the obscure and the classic in horror cinema.

Last week, in my review of The Howling, I noted that 1981 has been unofficially labeled “the year of the werewolf” by horror fans. During the summer months of that year, we saw the release of arguably the two greatest werewolf films ever made: The Howling and An American Werewolf in London. But there was another werewolf film released that year that isn’t as well remembered as those 80s classics. Coming out in between those celebrated releases was Michael Wadleigh’s Wolfen. One look at the behind-the-scenes talent of the film indicates that something different is afoot with this particular werewolf tale. It’s the only narrative feature from the director of celebrated documentary Woodstock, and is based on a novel by self-confessed alien abductee Whitley Strieber (Communion). Inspired by last week’s rewatch of The Howling, I decided to finally watch Wolfen and complete my viewing of the 1981 werewolf trifecta.

Pixar’s latest effort is an animated film that I had a little bit of reservation about when I walked in to see it. Cars 2 (2011), which is the appropriately titled sequel to Cars (2006), continues the adventures and hijinks of those lovable vehicles brought to life. Now, I must admit, the first film is probably my least favorite out of everything that Pixar has in their catalog. As light and fun as that movie was, its story was something we have seen before, it was geared towards a much younger audience, and it certainly did not have the emotional impact or catharsis that Pixar has given us in other movies, particularly in the last couple of years. With that in mind, I walked into this sequel a little hesitant. While the film was not as bad as I thought it would be (Pixar has never given us a “bad” movie, actually), and surprisingly better than the first, it definitely was not the great animated movie that seems to come out of this studio nearly every year.

Maybe I should open this review with a disclaimer. I work in education. I’m not a classroom teacher, but my days for the last five years have revolved around teenagers, and goals for their “success,” and all that sort of thing. I work with a lot of people who really care about what they do—and so do I. Yet, if you’ve watched videos I’m in or read my articles on this site, it probably won’t surprise you to know that I’m not among the most…how should I say…sunny of the faculty at my school. So perhaps I went into Jake Kasdan’s Bad Teacher with a slightly different kind of anticipation than some people will. A female-driven comedy that aims to have some fun with the “inspirational educator” genre? Yes, I’ll have some of that.